


Living Proof

by LaurenWritesFics



Series: Living Proof [1]
Category: Defending Jacob (TV 2020), Defending Jacob - William Landay
Genre: Courtroom Drama, Drama, F/M, Family Drama, Other, Thriller
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-12
Updated: 2021-03-12
Packaged: 2021-03-19 10:02:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,074
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29997705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LaurenWritesFics/pseuds/LaurenWritesFics
Summary: In the days leading up to Jacob Barber's trial, Laurie struggles to come to terms with the possibility that the boy she once cradled in her arms could be capable of murder. As cracks start to appear in the Barber family, Laurie begins to lose faith in her abilities as both a mother and a wife.
Relationships: Andy Barber & Jacob Barber, Andy Barber & Laurie Barber, Andy Barber/Laurie Barber
Series: Living Proof [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2206638
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	1. Awake

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: Inspired by 'Defending Jacob' (both the Apple TV series and the novel by William Landay). The use of existing copyrighted/trademarked companies/characters is done so without intent of ownership. All credit remains with William Landay.
> 
> The work shared here must not be posted, reproduced or altered in any way without the express permission of the author. However, reviews are very much welcomed.

PART ONE: AWAKE

12:36 AM.

As the red door of the Barber house came into view, Andy pulled into the driveway, triggering the porch light. Laurie was fast asleep, fingers curled around the handle of a blanket-covered car seat. Andy wished he didn’t have to wake them. Placing a hand on Laurie’s knee, he gently shook her. He unbuckled his seat belt and turned slowly, opening his door with a soft click.  
Laurie’s eyes flickered open and immediately flitted to the baby sleeping beside her. Andy smiled, a crooked, tired smile, and laid a hand on Laurie’s shoulder.

“Hey,” Laurie untucked the blue blanket from the sides of the car seat “we’re home.”

This had been the longest, most exhausting, happiest day of their lives.

Laurie reached for the bouquet of flowers freshly plucked from a hospital vase, and the pile of cards littered across the back seat.

It’s a boy! Congratulations on the birth of your son!

She put a hand to her chest. They didn’t have a son. They had Jacob.

Andy took hold of the car seat and walked carefully to the door, one hand on the small of Laurie’s back. Once inside, he lifted Jacob to his chest, Laurie’s hand shadowing his.

“Be careful.” Laurie half-whispered. “Support his head.”

“I’ve got it. I’ve got it.” Andy tucked the crown of Jacob’s head under his chin as the new family made their way upstairs.

It had only taken two weeks to prepare the nursery. Laurie knew exactly what she wanted. That was one of the many things Andy loved about her. She was completely, unfathomably organized. Hand-painted clouds floated above the white wooden crib in the corner of the room. Colorful wooden letters decorated with polka dots, stripes and clowns spelled out JACOB above the door. The crib was lined with stuffed animals and pillows, a mobile filled with plush moons and stars hanging above it.  
As they lay Jacob down, they watched him as he wriggled, clenching his tiny pink fists. His eyelids twitched, briefly opened, lips puckered, and then he dropped back into a peaceful sleep. Andy crept out of the room, but Laurie stayed put, unable to take her eyes off of her beautiful boy.

“He’s perfect.” She sighed.

Andy smirked, his eyes sparkling. “Just like his mommy.”

Laurie scoffed and shook her head.

In the bedroom, Laurie couldn’t settle. She tossed and turned, hands reaching out for the monitor on the nightstand so frequently that Andy grabbed it and tucked it into the gap between their two pillows.The antique clock in the hallway chimed.

1 AM.

Jacob cried. Laurie shot out of bed.

Silence.

The floorboards creaked. Her breath hitched.

Silence.

Jacob’s bedroom door was slightly ajar, a sliver of white light cascading from the window. His chestnut hair spread across his pillow in messy tufts. His eyelashes were still thin and long. His skin looked like soft porcelain. His lips still puckered when he slept.

He was fourteen years old.

Laurie blinked rapidly and pinched the bridge of her nose. Her world was falling apart. She exhaled and propped herself up against the wall, beginning to heave with panic as the same eleven words that had haunted her for the past week ran through her head again.

__

_Benjamin Rifkin. Fourteen years old. Stabbed three times in the chest._


	2. Fractures

PART TWO: FRACTURES

Jacob was awake. Andy could tell by the bright white light shining through the crack in his bedroom door. With a soft nudge, Andy opened the door and leaned into the room, glancing down at his watch.

“7:30 buddy. You know it’s Monday, right?”

Jacob sighed. “Duh.” He sat up, hunched over his phone, still in his pajamas. “I’m getting dressed.”

Andy shook his head, smirking. “Tell Sarah that mom and I say hi.”

Jacob launched himself off the bed and grabbed the door handle. “Oh my God.” He rolled his eyes. The door shut in Andy’s face.

In the kitchen, Laurie poured two cups of coffee, set them on the marble island and pulled her hair into a loose ponytail. She stood at the window, watching the leaves on the tall birch tree in the backyard sway in the morning breeze. Her eyes were glassy and drawn.

Andy stepped tentatively into the room.

“Good morning honey.” He pushed a loose, thick tendril of hair from Laurie’s face and kissed her cheek. Laurie didn’t turn to face him.

“Good morning.” Her voice was soft and thin. Something was wrong.

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing. I’m fine.” Laurie gripped the counter, knuckles turning white.

Andy put one hand on his hip and rested against the kitchen island. “Laurie…look at me.”

Laurie’s shoulders dropped and her head bowed. “I couldn’t sleep. That’s all.”

“Okay.” Andy took a sip of coffee and shrugged.

Laurie glanced at the ceiling, eyes darting to the right as she listened for footsteps. She turned to Andy.

“It’s Jacob.”

Andy’s eyebrows raised. There it is, he thought. “I know.”

Laurie’s eyes glistened with anger. “No, you don’t.” She hissed. “I am his _mother._ I carried him, I’ve cared for him all these years and now he’s gone, Andy. He’s gone. He doesn’t look at me anymore. Not like he used to.”

“He’s a teenager, Laurie. What did you expect?”

“I don’t know.” Laurie threw her arms out in defeat. “Arguments, sneaking out, dating the wrong girls. Not this.” The creak of floorboards above made Laurie lower her voice. “Not a son capable of _murder.”_

Andy’s lips tightened and he breathed deeply. “We don’t know anything for sure. Nobody does.”

“Exactly.” Laurie’s eyes darted to the kitchen archway, suddenly aware of Jacob’s heavy footsteps on the stairs. “That’s what hurts the most.”

Jacob entered the kitchen, sneezed loudly, sniffled and swiped his shirt sleeve across his nose. He was about to grab a bowl from the draining rack when Laurie held up a hand to stop him.

“Wash your hands.”

Jacob grumbled, begrudgingly doing as he was told. Laurie began pouring his cereal. He peered across the counter and protested.

“Oh my God, Mom, I’m not a kid.”

“I was just trying to help,” Laurie’s tone was slightly defensive “I don’t want you to get detention for tardiness again. You’re gonna have to start getting up earlier, Jake.”

Jacob snatched the bowl from Laurie’s hands and sat down.

“Whatever. I’m probably getting sick anyway.”

“Again? That’s the third time in two weeks, maybe we should see the doctor.”

“No!” Jacob snapped back. He dropped his spoon into the half-eaten bowl of cereal and pushed away from the table. “Just leave me the fuck alone.”

“Oh, very nice, Jacob.” Laurie yelled after him as he stormed into the hallway, slung his backpack over his shoulder and slammed the front door. “Have a good day!” Her voice was low and laced with sarcasm.

Andy slung an arm around Laurie’s shoulder and kissed her hair. They stood there for a moment, sharing in the thick silence that fell upon the room.  
They had watched him grow, relished in every small victory – his first steps, his first word, winning first prize at the Junior Science Fair (with Andy’s help) – they had dreamed of the young man he would grow up to be, the great things he could achieve – but now they were stuck in a waking nightmare.

Laurie’s breathing quickened. Her whole body ached and burned, as though it was slowly being torn apart. She fell against Andy’s chest and wept.


	3. The Chase

CHAPTER THREE: THE CHASE

Laurie couldn’t remember the last time she had gone running. Everything was a blur. Sitting at the kitchen table, she picked at a single piece of toast, butter-soaked crumbs leaving greasy trails on her fingers. She wasn’t hungry. She was tired. So tired.

A memory broke through the haze. The day Jacob started elementary school.  
The bus pulled away. Andy headed to work. Laurie put on her running shoes. She needed to know that he was safe. She needed to protect him.

That was the old Laurie. She was never coming back.

It was Thursday morning, and after three days of faking sickness, Jacob had returned to school.

Laurie watched Andy’s car pull out of the driveway. She smiled, blew a kiss and dropped her shoulders, tilting her head towards the grey morning sky. She took a long, slow breath and turned back into the hallway, slipped into her sneakers, tied her hair back, pulled on her track jacket and bolted out the door. Feet pounding against asphalt, adrenaline spurred her on. She turned down Walnut Street, past the library and the hair salon, head held high. She ran until flecks of light danced across her eyes. Until her breath rattled in her chest. Until she reached Cold Spring Park.

Laurie knew that Jacob hadn’t taken the bus that day.

Walking with the slow, metered steps of an acrobat on a tightrope, she headed deeper into the woods. Fallen branches crunched under her feet, soft, damp soil staining her white sneakers. A few steps ahead, yellow tape fluttered in the soft breeze, marking the spot where Benjamin Rifkin’s body was buried. Laurie’s heartbeat quickened. Her eyes stung. Fear and grief coursed through her body. Her hands began to shake, and she dropped to her knees.

_Had Dan and Joan Rifkin been here? Did they think Jacob had done this?_

Laurie couldn’t breathe.

The muscles in her calves trembled as she stood. Her whole body was numb.

Returning to an empty house was both a blessing and a curse. Laurie needed time to herself. But everywhere she looked, she saw Jacob. Sweet, smiling, laughing, happy Jacob. She took a bottle of water from the refrigerator and sunk into the soft cushioned couch. Relaxing after a run was usually something Laurie looked forward to. She would make coffee and watch terrible reality TV, completely tuned out from the world around her. Now, she was restless. She couldn’t – shouldn’t – enjoy herself. It was a betrayal of her duties as a wife, a mother, a pillar of the community.

Laurie’s cell phone buzzed loudly against the marble kitchen island. One of her colleagues from Children’s Cottage.

_We miss you, Laurie. Thoughts and prayers are with you and Andy. Come back whenever you’re ready. You’ll always have friends here._

Friends. Laurie had forgotten the meaning of the word. Her world was getting smaller each day. She missed her colleagues dearly. She missed the children. But she couldn’t face them. It was so hard to care for others when she was barely able to care for herself. The last few months had drained her, and she felt tremendously guilty. Resting her head against the arm of the couch, she attempted to sleep.

_The streaks of warm amber in his eyes were pale, his lips chapped and purple. His shirt was stained with glistening burgundy. Feet pointed, fists clenched, he lay half-buried in leaves and mulch. His chest rose with a jagged breath. A hoarse gasp. Blood foamed and trickled from his mouth, soaking into the ground. His head fell to one side, facing the trees with a final glassy stare._

Laurie woke with a start, eyes fixed on the ceiling. There was a large chip in the plaster. A water stain from months ago, when the shower had leaked. She had never noticed that before. The indelible traces of a damaged home. A damaged life. The cracks that had appeared in the Barber family could never be fully repaired. A mother’s love was supposed to be unconditional. A good mother doesn’t doubt her son or refuse to protect him. Laurie told herself this over and over again, in spite of the hurt she felt. Andy’s strength baffled her. He was taking on the Herculean responsibility of defending both his son and the integrity of his family in a murder case, and somehow he remained calm. Rational. Detached. Sometimes she hated him. But she always needed him.

Laurie’s cell phone rang again.

Andy.

“Hi, honey.” He half-whispered. “I’m gonna be home late tonight. Something’s come up.”

“Is it serious? Should I wait up for you?”

“It’s…it’s nothing. It’s fine. I’ll be home by eleven.”

“Andy, if there’s something I need to know…” Laurie sighed.

“Laurie, stop.” Andy’s tone was uncharacteristically sharp. “I’m handling it.”

“Handling what?” Silence. “Andy, what is it? You can tell me.”

Another long pause.

“They found a knife. They think it’s Jacob’s.”


End file.
